Getting a Corset

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“You’ve never worn a corset before?!”

Nope.

I’d been part of a sex-positive, ethically non-monogamous community for years. I didn’t get dressed up for sex, I got naked. Duh. At some point even “sexy” clothes were like speed-bumps (annoying and in the way) to the reason we were all there: sex.

Besides, I’m a California hippie – not a Victorian costume in my whole repertoire. I’m all bracelets, rings, and chains, wood and metal—natural clanking elements.

But I wanted to feel something. Something else. Sensations. Surrender. Uncertainty. Fear? Pleasure? Painpleasure or Pleasurepain?

So I entered into another arena, one where there are uniforms and rules and consequences.

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Beauty and the Dom

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This story is a fairytale but not the conventional kind.   It is a love story of sorts, yes I said love.  As I wrote about my Magical Surrender I had no idea that my heart would surrender.  I had no ideal that I would fall in love with this man who has shown me so many new things.  I have had play partners and closeness with others in the lifestyle but this is different in so many ways.

The Meet

When I met Jon from Bliss Bringers, I felt the need to run from him.  I don’t know if it was watching him as he was in his Dom mode or just the incredible amount of energy I felt around him that frightened me.  I felt I wanted to stay away from him but I also felt this pull like gravity.

My intrigue started in 2015 and has yet to wane in 2017.  We were both drawn, compelled even, to chat almost daily at first and then daily as our friendship progressed.   I never imagined that my friendship with him would lead me into such a wonderful relationship and a deep soulful love.  His honesty, integrity, knowledge and the sheer chemistry grew my trust, desire and love.

After 9 months of chatting and developing a friendship we played at a party.  It was fairly low key not what we would consider a "scene" in the BDSM world.   The sex was explosive and I wanted more of that mix of mystery, skill and excitement, and an energy I could lose myself in. We continued to play at parties over the next few months.

I grew such trust with him that it led me to try a real scene,  not just a sampler platter. I decided to really delve into BDSM and for the first time requested a solo date from my husband.  On that date Jon took me places I had never been and I was hooked.  Looking back, it wasn’t just the sex, or the BDSM it was the connection and incredible energy that became like a nuclear reactor in my heart.

Growth

My feelings grew and he became this amazing friend, life coach, mentor, Dom, and lover to me.  I met goals I have been trying to meet for years as I mentioned in The Diet Dom. I have let go of many controls and become a more relaxed person in the process.  He has given me emotional support and always encourages me in the healthiest way possible.

Realization

Neither of us were looking for a polyamorous relationship. We are both married and very in love with our spouses. We are both very open minded in the lifestyle.  We both avoided labeling what we were feeling until that no longer made sense. Our spouses seemed to know before we could admit it to ourselves and each other that we had fallen in love.  Mr. Puppy (my husband) and Mistress SinD (Jon’s wife) have been amazingly encouraging and supportive to us.  I can’t thank them enough for their willingness to share.  I love them both dearly.

Happily Every After

Finally, we let go into this great love as we both surrendered and shared our feelings with each other.  The friendship, trust, and the surrender have taken me down an amazing path that has brought me to a loving relationship with my Sir, my Dom, lover and boyfriend Jon. This man I was once afraid of has become a great love and just as in a fairytale a prince to me.  Our journey and story to be continued.......

P.S. Jon... I love you!

Mrs. Puppy (Pet)

51: Just Hanging Out

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 44:57 — 20.6MB)

SinD, Reverend Jon, Bill and Alice hang out together in this post-action debrief bedcast.  It was Alice's first visit to a BDSM dungeon (we took her to "Dragon's Gate" in Los Angeles), where she got tied up and suspended, and had all sorts of things done to her.    We give our updates and review our progress in the lifestyles of BDSM, Swinging and polyamory.

 

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The Diet Dom: Lose Weight, Feel Great, Be Healthy

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I have been roller coaster dieting all of my life.  Accountability has always been an issue.   I never imagined Rev. Jon would end up being my "Diet Dom" as I started calling him as a joke.  I've learned that a Dom can show you magical bliss but he/she can also act as a life coach and teacher.  A great Dom will use his power over you for more than pleasure. He/she will use their power to better you and care for you in ways you may not be able to accept from someone else.

Healthy Goals

One day Rev. Jon asked me if I was working on any personal goals. We had a very casual conversation where I expressed my desire to take better care of myself and be healthier.   In late September I was chatting with him and told him that my work place was filled with chocolate which coworkers had brought in and how I was feeling weak and wanting to blow my healthy diet. He simply said “Don’t do it!”  It came across as a command to me and I felt it in my gut. Since that day I have not eaten a single piece of chocolate at my work.  When I look at chocolate all I can think is “Don’t do it!”
We started with the chocolate but now many of my health goals are included.   I am now taking vitamins, drinking more water, eating healthy (with one cheat day), going to the gym 5 days a week,  I’ve given up diet soda and most recently given up the Splenda sugar substitute in my coffee.  Some of these items I set the parameter for and Rev. Jon reinforces and other things he has asked me to do to support my healthy goals.

Tracking

Rev. Jon does not request information from me daily but I know he may ask me about my eating or Fitbit tracking at any time. I agreed to notify him of any stumbles on my diet or exercise. This helps me be accountable and successful in reaching my goals.  He has also asked me to wear a rubber bracelet (the kind you get from charities).  If I consider breaking a goal I am to snap the bracelet to bring me out of compulsion to the awareness of my goals.

Slip-Ups

I try to be the perfect sub and follow the rules but sometimes I make mistakes. One night while out with friends on a day that was not a sanctioned junk food day I ate 4 large greasy onion rings.  I didn’t even look at the rubber bracelet.  The next morning I promptly told Rev. Jon that I blew my diet.  We had never discussed how he would reinforce my goals if I made a mistake.  I never asked because I didn’t think I would blow it.  I thought he would be disappointed and probably lecture me.

 

Punishment

First thing he told me is that it was ok.  I had a lot of anxiety at that moment so it was exactly what I needed to hear. The anxiety comes not from fearing him but from feeling that I may have disappointed him.  He asked me several questions about the situation that led to me crashing my diet. There was no anger and no lecture.  I was asked if I was ready to know what my punishment was.  That question froze me in place and I waited for the next text to arrive. Four days without orgasm and that night I was to bring myself to the brink of orgasm and stop.

For me, since I am a very sexual person and engage in almost daily masturbation the punishment felt severe. Still I didn’t argue or plead my case.  That isn’t what a good sub does.  I kept in mind that his ultimate goal is to guide me and teach me.  It was a tough four days and during that time I couldn’t help but to ask for a reprieve. I wasn’t upset when he said no and I actually respect him more for it even though I hoped for a yes.

At the end of the fourth day I saw him.  I was anxious that my failure would be brought up and that I would feel bad about it.  In most relationships when someone fails and lets the other person down it is often dredged up over and over.

When I saw him we had short discussion and it was finished because I had successfully completed the punishment.    Sure, it may come up as a reminder but there is no emotional battering when a mistake is made.  With the right Dom/sub relationship dynamic you both move on no anger, no grudges, and no guilt.  The level of productive communication and validation is very healthy and conducive to happiness and growth for both people.

Rev. Jon reminds me of my goals and keeps me on track. I have lost  about 4 pant sizes and running three miles in less than 30 minutes.  I am healthier now than I have been in years! Even my bloodwork is reflecting the differences.  Besides the health benefits Rev. Jon adds  a fun bonus by setting challenges where I get to choose a reward for success.

A Dom can be so much more than someone who plays naughty games with you.  A Dom can offer you support, guidance, and that extra nudge no one else in your life quite has the power to do.  The goals I have reached under Rev. Jon's guidance have been on my list for several years.  Though I have chosen to surrender to Rev. Jon he empowers me as a person to reach my goals and be better than the person I was.  I am very thankful to him for the care and time he takes to help me.  I can't wait to see what I can accomplish by his side or should I say at his feet.

Mrs. Puppy

Fantasy to Fetish

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The Fantasy

Fantasies can become a reality with the right person.  Sir (Rev. Jon) is all about fulfilling fantasies.   One day he asked if I had any particular fantasies I might like to try. I laughed and jokingly said “Yes, someday I want to ride you wearing a collar and a leash”.  I didn’t think it would ever happen.

The night we recorded Puppies and Massages,  Rev.  Jon brought the collar and leash out for the first time.  We had just finished recording and he started the session by placing the collar around my neck then leading me across the room to the spanking bench.  Being so new to BDSM, I wasn’t sure if I was mortified or turned on but I went with it. My fantasy became a reality and as I let go it was hot wearing the collar which reminded me I was his submissive.

The next day I wasn’t sure how I felt about the collar.  There my feelings were in contradiction, embarrassment that I had worn leash yet had been sexually turned on by it.  I told Sir that I didn’t think I was ready for the thick collar that I had tried. I asked that if we ever tried a collar again that it be something much thinner.   He suggested that I pick something out that I was comfortable with.  I was so happy that he was flexible about letting me explore my fantasy.

The Training Collar

I admit, the collar started out a fantasy and not something I really understood the power of.  I went to Petco and selected this little narrow leather collar.  I thought it would be cute so I had a dog tag made. It said Mrs. Puppy on one side and "If found Return to Rev. Jon" on the other.   I gave it to him in a gift bag at dinner at the Lazy Dog restaurant  (yes, we actually ate there).  He seemed amused but had this familiar look that he gives me that lets me know I have no idea what is in store for me. I literally didn’t have much intention of wearing it at the time. I thought we would play with it once in awhile when the mood struck.

Before I knew it this little collar which I jokingly selected became part of our ritual to start our scene. Though Rev. Jon engages with me with or without a collar when he places the collar around my neck he is making his intentions clear that he will be taking over control and I will fully surrender during the time I am wearing it.

A few weeks ago I wore the collar to a party and several people thought it was adorable and admired the tag. I felt so proud to wear what I once thought of as a silly fantasy.  At the party we were fully engaged as Dom and sub and the meaning of the collar continued to gain significance for me.

The Perfect Collar

Around that time we discussed my collar and he agreed that it was time for something a little thicker with a little more design.   At his suggestion I started looking online.  I thought he would want to pick the collar but he wanted me to pick something that felt special to me.  He recommended LiquidNymph because they make high quality custom collars. I went to their online shop on Etsy and admired so many collars. I kept trying to get Sir to give me direction but he merely said the collar I chose had to speak to me.

When I chose the first collar at Petco, I was only focused on what I could handle to wear and really wasn’t serious about it. This time I felt like I was making a huge decision.  To pick the perfect collar wasn’t just about me and what I liked or how I felt.  I wanted a collar Sir would be proud for me to wear as his sub.  I wanted something that was sophisticated but not so fancy it camouflaged the fact that I was wearing a collar.  It took me a few weeks but I found the perfect collar at LiquidNymph.  Kristy Hatton, the designer of my collar was quick to respond to questions about sizing.  She even made sure to contact me after my order was placed to ask my neck measurement so they could remove any excess material to make the collar fit me perfectly.  My collar was delivered in about 4 days. It was packaged beautifully in a small black mesh bag which included a thank you card. I couldn’t wait for Rev. Jon to place it around my neck.  When he did, it fit perfectly and I could tell it was the right choice by the way he looked at me.   I can’t wait to wear it to an event! 

What I once saw as a silly little fantasy has become an important symbol and ritualistic fetish with deep meaning.  When Rev. Jon places that beautifully crafted collar around my neck I know I am his if even for a short time. My passionate surrender ignited by that little snap and the question that follows “Are you ready for this?”

 

 

 

 

49: Spanking new relationships: The scale from swinging to polyamory

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Mister Bill, Jon and SinD first debrief about  Fetish and Fantasy event, then about their various polyamorous and swinging relationships.   Bill does an inventory of his relationships and reviews how they are similar but different.

Jon interviews a brand-new member of the "Dragon's Gate" gang, who at her young age has dived deep into kink and her various turn-ons.

Back home, the newly formed poly gang (SinD, Jon, Night owl) debriefs about the changes in their relationship.

This episode is a bit different from the usual form, as we give our unfiltered feelings an thoughts on the journey throughout the various forms of non-monogamy.

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Serendipitous Euphoria

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It is amazing how opening myself to one experience has caused me to stumble into an entirely different state of being that often involves unexplainable feelings of euphoria.  I discussed the magic I experience in my previous post "Magical Surrender".

For one to understand the totality of that magic elaboration is needed.

The Count

It all started with “The Count”.  I am not referring to the one on Sesame Street, instead I am referring to the countdown to orgasm.  In my first experience with Rev. Jon the rule was to ask for an orgasm.  The first time I asked in the session he said I could cum if I counted to 10.  The task seemed impossible and I failed miserably as you probably heard  about in Puppies and Massages.

In my orgasmic state, after all of the overwhelming sensations, I couldn’t remember how to count to 10.  I could not focus on anything other than the intense pleasure I was experiencing.   Still I thought he was having fun with me and that it was just this little game. I didn’t realize it was training that leads to an unimaginable possibility.

The weeks following that intense first session I was asked to count to 10 before allowing myself to orgasm during masturbation.  I did what Rev. Jon said although I felt silly but I did not question his order.  I failed many times but soon I was counting to 10 the majority of the time.  After a few weeks of training the counting began to inspire the orgasm rather than permit it.

Commanded to Pleasure

One day I received a text message from Rev. Jon that said “I want you to count down and cum”.

When I read the message I agonized. I knew that what he was requesting wasn’t possible.

I was sure couldn't cum by counting and no physical stimulation.

I am not a liar who could pretend, even to satisfy a man I wish to please.

Shortly after, I saw numbers being texted to me and as the count hit 1 he texted “CUM NOW!”.

I stared at the message and felt as though this wave of energy came over my crown washing down and over me.   Immediately a wealth of endorphins rushed through my body and the level of sexual stimulation that ran through me caught me off guard.  I was left shaking, panting, and confused.  Unlike an orgasm stimulated through the clitoris or G-spot where the stimulation begins in the sex organs and releases chemicals from the brain it was a reversal.  My brain set off the chemicals and my sex organs responded. The sensation ran down my body instead of up my body is the best way to describe it. At this point, If Rev. Jon texts or orders me to cum in person it does not matter what I am doing or who I am in front of I will cum on command.  The level of euphoria that comes with this orgasm is much higher than a physically stimulated orgasm and the after effects last for hours.

I can’t explain how or why I can cum on command when he gives the order or why I experience such a chemical release that leads me into a euphoric state.   Rev. Jon may have the answers to how this works. Perhaps a great Dom just like a great magician never reveals their secrets.

I can only explain it as magical because the experience doesn’t fall into a category of anything I have ever thought was possible.  If I could bottle this experience and sell it, the world would be hooked.   Since  I can't sell the experience in a bottle, I hope that you will be encouraged to delve into this magical world on your own.  I had met several people who engaged in BDSM before I had this experience but no one shared their intricate details.

Perhaps because it is so powerful, it is hard to describe or maybe people feel it would be unbelieveable to others to describe something like orgasm on command.  Since I had no clue how wonderful it could be and I didn't go looking for a Dom it was all a beautiful accident to meet Rev. Jon and begin this journey with him.   I am so thankful to him for teaching me and giving me these experiences. I am so excited to see what will come next.   I can’t wait to share more with all of you.

Mrs. Puppy

Swinging with a side of Kink

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It had been a long week. As much as she loved her life, it was a busy CHALLENGING life. Her two babies, little angelic gifts that they were, took so much time and energy. She loved putting that time in, being a mother brought her great joy but by the end of the week she had to admit that she was exhausted and needed a break. 

On top of that, she had been putting in more hours than usual at work. Her career was another aspect of her life that truly fulfilled her but free time had gotten quite scarce. 

But tonight would be a break from the stress and hectic action of her routine. Tonight they had a naughty couple coming to play. Tonight would be DECADENT!  She could hardly wait.  Continue reading →

Magical Surrender

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"Me Submit? Never!"

I once said that.

I can tell you that every man I know has the same reaction when they listen to the Puppies and Massages episode of Bliss Bringers. They cannot believe that I would try having a submissive experience. In general, I have a very dominant personality and am the type to take control in almost every situation. I admit that there was a time that I thought only weak-willed or meek people could surrender to such an experience.

I've discussed this topic with many people and that seems to be a common misconception, especially with people outside of the swing lifestyle. BDSM is still not very mainstream despite the huge success of 50 Shades of Grey. That book is a sad misrepresentation of BDSM and what it is that fuels the enjoyment of surrender or appeal of domination.

Continue reading →